Finding Time part 2

     Sometimes a memory will just pop in your head. Recently I had one come to me it was a good memory. It was when I was really young and it was snowing out. My sister and my dad where with me. We were all bundled up in snow wear.

 My dad had made a type of box sled and I was in it. He had a rope on it and was pulling us around the yard. I was getting very cold I asked my dad to hold me. I remember him picking me up and holding me close. I laid my head on his shoulder and I felt so safe and warm. He was laughing and said don't worry little bug I will keep you warm. I knew he would for as long as he could.

It wasn't too much longer after that we moved to Florida, without my dad. That started a long list of times I would be away from him. He did come to visit us in Florida but it wasn't until I was about 8. He then had remarried the wicked witch from part 1 Take time. When I first met her in Florida she seemed really nice.

We all went to the beach and she got a really bad sunburn. All she did was moan and groan about it. They were staying in a motel not far from where we lived. I felt bad for her but for some reason my sister and her didn't get along with her. But it was good to spend time with my dad. Much later is when I realized why my sister and her didn't get along.

Now back to where I left off in part 1. It was in June in Texas and I had come to stay with my dad and step mom for the summer. I had been having problems with my mom in Florida. I was getting used to the heat but not my step mom. She was driving me crazy. I couldn't do anything right according to her.

If something went wrong it was my fault and I made it happen. I didn't get to spend much time with my dad she was jealous of any time I spend with him. So I figured out how to spend time by getting up when he did for work. He always fixed his own breakfast. So I would lay there waiting to hear him move around and then get up really fast and have a glass of juice ready for him.

We would talk but not about my step mom. He didn't know about the way she acted when he wasn't around, but I didn't know what to do about it. He would ask me if I was happy to be there and I would feel bad for him. I would tell him I was happy to be there so I could see him more. I told him I didn't like her much but he said I need to give her a chance to get to know her.

Their daughter was only 2 and just as cute as a bug. I spent a lot of time taking care of her,that was one of my jobs while I was there. She didn't work but stayed around the house doing some stuff but mainly telling me what to do. I had to do laundry hang out cloth diapers. Fold them just the right way or have to start over.

She wasn't letting me go to the pool as much. She figured out what I was doing to spoil her fun. About the GIs flirting with me. I was able to get some of the guys away from her and tell them what she was up to. They spread the word and were just treating me like a little sister. She didn't like that so that ended the pool time. I still went some just not every day like I wanted.

About the only way I could get away from her was to take the trash out and walk the dog. I did finally meet some of the other army kids around the post. There was a few cute guys and they had sisters so I was able to get some of the girls to come over to the house and meet her the witch. And that is just what they thought of her by the time they left. They all knew what she was like. But since she had gotten to meet them she started letting me go out for about 45 minutes in the evening to hang out, but I had to be back by dark.

That didn't last for too long around the end of June I was grounded wasn't able to leave the house.
What had happened was she had let me stay out to hang out and decided to come spy on me to see what we were up to. Really all before this nothing had been going on. I finally got this one guy I liked to talk to me. We were just standing around talking and laughing.

 He leaned in and gave me a peck on the cheek and she just walked up. She started calling me all kinds of names. Said I would be pregnant before I was 16. Grabbed my arm and tried to pull me away. I was so embarrassed I pulled back, but that didn't do anything but make her that much more angry. She grabbed me again and said to get home now you whore. She took off walking really fast, I didn't even get to explain anything.



She slapped me across the face really hard then pushed me away and said you will not speak to him like that. You are to respect your father at all times. From now on you will do as I say and be with me for 24 hrs a day. My dad looked so sad and shook his head and told me I had let him down. He believed everything she had told him. He just turned and walked away.

When he was out of the room she grabbed my arm really hard and said you are just a whore like your mother and I will be damned if you hurt my husband again. She was hurting me and squeezed really tight. She was really strong and I was 12, she was a bully that was for sure and I had just met her head on. I stared back at her and said my mother isn't a whore and you know it, you are the whore. She slapped me hard again but it was worth it.

 The fight was on. She had thought I would whimper and cry but I didn't I stood up to her and she didn't like it. She made me stay awake all that night cleaning the house. I wasn't allowed to to sleep until 6 am. Then when the baby was awake at 9 I had to take care of her. I was miserable but I wouldn't show it. I wanted to tell my dad but she wouldn't even let me see him in the morning. She grounded me for 2 weeks. I would be going home in late August that was a long way away.

 I knew she was going to make sure I was miserable but I was a lot stronger than she thought. I just kinda took it all on the outside and held it in. I had her daughter to distract me and that helped. I asked to call my mom and she said no. I wrote my mom a letter but wasn't able to mail it. She made sure I was around her 24/7. I really was confused at what had happened and why the change in her behavior. I now know she was jealous of me and didn't want me to be happy. She wanted to hurt me to hurt my mom. She hated my mom really a lot.

 I didn't know if they had words or something had happened. All I know is she had decided she was going to take it all out on me. She had my dad convinced that I was a liar and a whore. And unless he let her make me behave and let her discipline me I would do nothing but get into trouble. I started getting angry with my dad but wasn't even able to talk to him about it. She wouldn't let me get up at 6 with him for breakfast any more. I had to get up at 6 but stay in the other room away from him.

I asked her why I had to stay there if she hated me so much she said it was because my dad wanted me to be there so he could be my father. She said he has a new daughter and will get over wanting me there really soon she would make sure of it. I wasn't a dummy I knew I was in trouble but didn't know what to do about it. The only time I would cry is when everyone was asleep. I never wanted her to hear me or know how hurt I was.